Sometimes the best desicion....

can be the most painful to make.

As of Friday we have decided to take Kenna out of school and home school her for the rest of the year and then start her over in the first grade in the fall. We have known for a while that she might need to be retained but had hope that maybe she would progress quickly and make it to the 2nd grade with all of her friends, but since the second half of the year has started she is falling behind quickly. She is young, wont be 7 till the middle of June, so she could have gone either way. But because she was a girl we didn't really think through "when" she should go to school we just sent her when everyone else went at her age. But now we see that she will benefit from repeating the 1st grade. She does fine in every subject except reading which spills over into all other subjects when it gets harder. We are taking her to a learning center just to make sure she doesn't have a reading disconnect but I really do feel its more her age and brain development more than anything. Jay and I both feel that education is important but its not the most important to us. Who Kenna becomes in the Lord is the most important thing to us and it seems as though the Lord is teaching Kenna a lot about life at a young age of 6. She is so sensitive to the Lord and has grown in her faith and yet for a little girl who is so social, leaving her friends is heart breaking. We started talking with her about it in November and she would sob at the thought of not being in the same class as her friends. Jay and I started praying (along with lots of other friends and family) that the lord would give us wisdom in what would be best for Kenna. We didn't want to give up on her but we didn't want to deny reality either. What brought it to a head was that she just hasn't been herself for the last 5 months. The pressure that she feels in knowing that she doesn't read like everyone else has slowly taken its toll on our sweet little girl. With homework and being at school all day long she hasn't had much time to be a kid and that is no way to live when you are six. Many people have said why not send her to a different school that isn't so academically driven but for us that isn't an option. We love Foundations because they expect more out of kids in the area of character and education. Her teacher has been a God send. She adores Kenna and loves her deeply and has been there along side Jay and I helping us and praying for us. I don't believe at any other school she would have been taken care of in such a compassionate way. Kenna will have the same teacher next year and that will be a huge blessing for Kenna who will have to adjust to making new friends (which I don't see being a problem =)) She will be right where she needs to be next year in the 1st grade. How is Kenna taking this? She is relieved! Which is an answer to our prayers! We have spent so much time praying with her about God's will and what that means and she really seems to have a peace about the whole thing. ALL PRAISE BE TO GOD! Our little girl is preciouse and we pray that she will become a woman who loves the Lord and loves people...two things that seem to be her gift.

I will home school Kenna for the rest of the year. We are going to back up a little and just work on reading and math do crafty things and learn to cook together. Start easy and build confidence as well as skills. Over the week she has become even more excited about staying home and helping me, and having me be her teacher and I too think it will be a growing time for our mother/daughter relationship. I have found the Lord to be so faithful and very accessible through this time and know whole heartily that he is growing not only Kenna but me also. Its not always easy to be refined but in the end it is a beautiful thing. He has taught me that it is better to go to Him first and He has shown me the benefits of doing so. We have spent time talking with friends and teachers but for the most part the Lord has been our director in all decisions. These verses have helped me return to him before anyone else during this time.

Hebrews 4:16

Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Psalm 121:2

My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and earth.

Because this topic has taken many hours of prayer and thought I wanted to post the details so that I don't wear myself out talking about it. Ive been known to do that! =)